I’ve learned in these past six years and since my sister’s recovery from Crohn’s disease, that in life, there are so many fragile things that make us and break us. That breakage includes our hopes, dreams and hearts and when it happens, the wounds inflicted never show on the skin because they run deeper and become more hurtful than anything that ever bleeds.
There’s a song from Nine Inch Nails called, “The Day The Whole World Went Away” and it’s one of my favorites. I’ve been listening to NIN ever since I was recommended to by one of my best friends, and I always feel like this song is about self-discovery and showing to people you’re okay when every action and tone contradicts your core. When we’re falling apart, we often portray something we’re not, and end up paying the “sweetest price” by fooling everyone and destroying the very empire these lies in our world create. In an effort to win others’ affection and get what we want—have the best of both worlds, we lie. We all live in a culture of lies and half-truths, and I’m never going to understand why. How well do we really know each other? When does the omission of truth become a lie? How honest are we with each other, and more importantly with ourselves? Can we be truly happy if we live a lie just to avoid repeating past trauma? Can we be truly happy knowing we’ve hurt someone because of our lies?
Because we have brains and behaviors that are inherently taught from the dawn of time to create the greatest winning chance at life, liars sadly, get what they want personally and professionally without any punishment. They will say a million and one things that are caring and kind, but supposedly are far from it. Sure, karmic reaction exists, but how long till others really see the light? In this song, Reznor hits the nail on the head with the concept of living a lie. We all know that some lies are considered worse than others, but the meaning and intention behind each is just as important, if not more than the lie itself. If we go for such long periods of time lying and throwing our truths under the rug, the more hard it is to really trust and know who we are at the end of the day. So, where do we draw the line?
Today is one of those days where I become stronger because of the effect of lies.
And you can say it was nothing and feel piteous, but it felt like the world.
I’d listen to the words he’d say
But in his voice I heard decay
The plastic face forced to portray
All the insides left cold and gray
There is a place that still remains
It eats the fear, it eats the pain
The sweetest price he’ll have to pay
The day the whole world went away